We get it, not feeling the day’s run a marathon under the guise of color war competition. Get some shade, catch up with your friends and click into your favorite tunes, just to find the page blocked. Of course, Mahalo’s got you covered this summer with how to get on MySpace at Camp.

Maybe you’re at band camp. Real band camp, not an eleventh sequel to ruin the American Pie franchise Band Camp. And you got on MySpace, checked out all your favorite cello players, you’re in the right spot, but the playing just isn’t happening for you. Try reading a step-by-step guide then. How to begin to play cello.

Following the summer theme, we’ve got how to make frozen yogurt and how to use solar power.

But relish in the accomplishment with a gift or vacation, or spring for the expensive Ramen Noodles. Nourish the minds of America’s future leaders.

Or get some sweet games with our guide on how to get free blackberry software. Start a love of racing with our guide on how to watch the Indy 500. Or start a new book with some new technology: how to use Amazon Kindle.

What’s that, more about grad school? Yeah, we get it. How to take the bar exam is also posted.

Enjoy the weekend.

How about some public action with our guide on how to win a school election.

How about some better grades with our guide on how to do science homework.

How about school supplies with our guide on how to buy school supplies. Now you can write those notes down instead of trying to remember all of college.

Check out our guides and answers pages to contribute on your summer plans.

So with a bit of a retrospective, we’ve drawn up some school-related guides in case you want to do things different next year.

Be the next Michael Phelps – err, Olympics Michael Phelps, not tabloid-photo Michael Phelps – with our guide on how to join the school swim team.

Or if the swimming dreams aren’t working out, maybe some more focus in class won’t hurt next year: How to do algebra homework and how to graduate high school.

And if none of that is working out either, then we’ve got how to clean a school blackboard, or just save all the trouble with how to homeschool your children.

On second thought, just enjoy the summer.

To all the mothers, we say treat yourselves. We’ve put together a hodgepodge of guides today which offer a pretty wide range of ventures and activities to explore.

Like, how to be a Cirque du Soleil performer. Hey, it’s never too late, right? Or just how to buy Cirque du Soleil tickets for the sons still hunting for the right gifts.

Or how about getting another degree? Check out our guides on how to choose a film school or how to choose a law school. Or get out on the road and get paid for it. How to choose a truck driving school is now posted as well.

Enjoy the weekend.

Either way, no matter how things go as we ride out the recession, we want our readers to be secure in the bare essentials. Or at least have fire. So check out our guide on how to start a fire without a lighter or matches. Use responsibly please.

And speaking of awkwardly forced transitions, we’re still upping our makeover trend this week with our guide on how to buy cheap designer clothes online.

Or go nuts and buy crazy expensive clothes with a second mortgage (take that, recession). This is part of – though not our entire motivation – behind our guide on how to get a loan with bad credit. Again, use responsibly please.

And to justify our article on making fire (insert Beevis sound effect “Fire.”), check out how to survive a foreign invasion. And to compliment the article on getting more loans with bad credit, how about a job hunt article: how to become a graphic designer.

With our surging popularity on google searches (but we’re still working on it at the local discoteque) thanks to our article on how to find a husband, we’re continuing the vein this week. Mostly because all our mothers keep calling and asking if we’ve met someone yet.

Since it’s in everyone’s state of mind, we wrote up a page on how to be beautiful.

And to compliment our husband finding article yesterday, take a look at today’s how to find a wife.

Granted, fellas, if can’t hurt if you learn some culinary techniques, so take a look at our pages on how to make authentic Italian food and how to make authentic Chinese food.

Topping off the culinary tour we’ve offered all week, here’s one more guide on how to make authentic Mexican food.

Don’t let our eight-straight days of Cinco de Mayo blogging belie that there’s a lot of other stuff to look forward to. Mother’s Day is coming up, and with David Souter leaving the Supreme Court, it’s time to dust up those job applications in case Obama comes a-knocking.

You’re going to want to look sharp for your Supreme Court job interview. So check out our guide on how to get a hair weave. That should do the trick.

Maybe this is all news to you because your computer is on the fritz (if, so, please bookmark us at the library where you’re reading this). It could be time to get a fresh start with your notebook, so we wrote up a guide on how to reformat a laptop.

Have fun tonight.

But of course we recommend the more traditional Cinco de Mayo celebration, which is why we’ve added more How-Tos to help you have the perfect holiday: how to make fajitas, quesadillas and cinco de may cupcakes are all online.

And as we’re known for doing, Mahalo is still there for your dating and relationship needs. Go all-out with our guide on how to find a husband. Or take the online approach to social interaction (like we do at Mahalo) with our guide on how to install a webcam.

Happy Cinco de Mayo-ing, and don’t do anything mom wouldn’t do. She’ll remind you on Sunday.

Because what says labor strife like pants? They’re nothing but an itchy sign of conformation that you’re a servant to The Man. And today, you don’t have to wear pants. You’ll still get fired for this, but at least it will be for a good cause.

Plus it’s a good warm-up for people whose pants go missing on Cinco de Mayo next Tuesday. We have all your weekend festivities how-to guides. How to throw a Cinco de Mayo party; How to Make Burritos; and How to Make Enchiladas.

Or maybe you’re taking the weekend to prep for the holiday itself. Pretty yourself up with our guide on how to get hair extensions and make sure your car is in tip-top shape with our guide on how to change a tire.

Wear no pants responsibly.